I've been seeing my therapist for about six months now,
and I look forward to each visit. Since day one, she has listened to my
issues and given me really sound advice and helpful tips to help with my
sleep habits, anxiety, stress, and how to discuss my problems with
others. She tells me to contact her if anything happens, and checks up
on recent issues I have been facing. Most importantly, she cares. She
genuinely cares about me, and treats me more than a patient, but
actually as a friend.
After being diagnosed depressed in December and starting medication, the next step was to visit a psychiatrist to get a proper diagnosis and further research my medication and see if there's a possibility that something else might be "wrong" with me.
However, when I made the appointment in December, the wait was so long that I didn't get to see a psychiatrist until today, March 23rd.
I have been really anxious to see a psychiatrist, mostly because of the medical side of things. I've been nervous to sit down with a medical professional and pick at my brain to see what else is in there that I don't know about. But, at the same time, I was ready for treatment.
When I got to her office, she had forgotten about my appointment, so i caught her off-guard. Then, she looked at my paperwork, and would call me "Kim" by accident because my last name is "Kimes". Aside from the mistakes, I didn't receive a welcoming or gentle nature from her like I did with my therapist.
This was the first five minutes of being in her office, and I already felt uncomfortable, so I shut down.
The hour went by with a series of questions that I know are required of her to ask, and a series of hesitation in my mind that anything was going to be fixed. Ultimately, I felt like another typical depressed patient that she wanted to fix, and not as a human being. She seemed to make assumptions about my life without ever having met me.
For example:
"Do you often feel like being away from people?"
"Yeah...I mean, lately I have found it hard to go..."
"...to work?"
"No...to social events."
"Are you sexually active?"
"Yes." (TMI, sorry.)
"Have you had long-term relationships in your past?"
Thinking back to a relationship I had a few years ago that lasted four years.
"Yeah."
"Are you depressed because of a recent breakup? was the breakup hard for you?"
"No...[unnamed] stole my identity and that is why I'm depressed."
"Oh...dear. You poor thing."
"Do you drink alcohol?"
"Only on weekends."
"How much do you drink?"
"Over the span of the whole weekend?"
"Yes."
"Hm...I'd say probably somewhere around four drinks for the whole weekend."
"Oh my. That's too much. I think you should look into the 12 Steps from Alcoholics Anonymous."
At the end of the appointment, she diagnosed me with "Adjustment Disorder". She told me she'd like me to take some tests and return in three weeks. I'm going to take the tests, return in three weeks, and hope for better results. If nothing better happens, I may consider seeing someone else who might not categorize me as if they know me.
I just hope I can get better soon.
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